Hope

The Anthill Ashes

When life lies down
on the song of a bird
The resurrection
returns my name
And I break
the brakes of senses
To taste
the steady pain

My cross is nailed
into me
I pity the fingers
that scourge my face
The minutes
hurry the hours
The hours
hurry the days

The loyal faces
approach
And run along
with every summer
Beside the flooded feet
of love
The hardened lives
are turning numb

Between my feet
against the wind
My words will cascade
through the strife
But if inside my eyes
you see the flying geese
The ropes will pause
the next worn life

The seasoned time
has buried signs
And swings like a branch
above a lost sandal
I step inside
the ant hill ashes
Becoming new
and larger ant hill

This painting and poem is by a beautiful little girl named Akiane. She has an amazing testimony and is a child prodigy in art and poetry. Visit her website www.artakiane.com

I often arrive here when I am moved. It's been an interesting past month and a half. Life has had many moments. I have absolutely loved the variety of my job but I have come home in tears after a few. It has been exciting and I love walking into a new environment everyday. That's why I'm not sure I could ever teach the same classes 10 months straight. I love the quick intro games and get-to-know you games. I love introducing myself for the first time and helping the kids remember my name. :) I love that I bought a neon yellow whistle so that I could teach PE. I love that I have stuck through a few of the days and classes that I'm not sure I could normally have.

I am continually questioning the education system however. I love learning, and I know I am mostly successful in managing the class. However the learning part on behalf of the students I feel, leaves a lot to be desired. I know I'm only a sub but I feel like there are so many ways to learn outside of the classroom and kids just get stuffed into these classrooms and half the class is wasted on managing others kids' behavior or learning problems. I am not sure where my hope lies in the learning. I really do enjoy challenges and reading and studying... but how much more do I learn through experience?

I am so excited to be learning more right now through reading. I have honestly never read so much in my life! I have read fiction and non-fiction. I am keeping a list... (surprise!) of the books I have read and the books I want to read. I can learn so much in a short period of time, spending little-to-no money from books! I am at the library a lot! It is interesting: on my days off this summer I would drive into town (Kelowna) and one of my favorite places to go was Chapters. I loved going and reading and even just looking through the books. It was so peaceful there. I was often on my own on my day off and I didn't want to stay around camp for the day or go to the mall. I am particularly interested in Christian history. My next goal is to go to bible school.

I am filled with emotion as of late. I guess that means a lot of things. I tear up or cry at everything! Life is so moving. I never thought I would! We have so much hope. I am so confident in Jesus and who he is. I find my biggest struggle is wanting all of these great character qualities but I get so distracted I lose focus of what's most important. Relationship, relationship, relationship. The thing that is the most hardest in life is the most valuable.

Well, my ramblings have come to a close. I am not much of a writer when it comes to the inner expressions. I find it is so hard to get it on paper. But I suppose that is a brief synopsis of my life right now.

Psalm 130:7
O Israel, put your hope in the LORD, for with the LORD is unfailing love and with him is full redemption.

Matthew 12:21
In his name the nations will put their hope."

Melanie Out